As a coach, actively listening to my clients is essential. Whether you’re a leader, a professional, a job seeker, a spouse, a parent, or anyone who interacts with people, active listening is a skill you need!

Yes, that’s my not-so-subtle way of saying that everyone needs this skill.

For those that are not already familiar, there are three levels of listening:

Level 1: Internal Listening

At this first level, you’re focused on your own thoughts, often “listening to speak.” For instance, when someone shares their recent vacation story, you’re thinking about what you want to say about your own vacation. This is a natural way to begin a conversation and build rapport.

Level 2: Focused Listening

At this second level, you begin active listening. You’re fully present, tuning into the other person’s ideas, thoughts, and feelings. You engage in understanding their motivations, perspective, and reality.

Level 3: Global Listening

This highest level goes beyond words. You listen with all your senses, picking up on non-verbal cues and the energy of the conversation. This is what people mean when they say, “read the room.” It’s about grasping the underlying context and subtext.

 

So how can you strengthen your ability to listen actively? Here are a few things to try:

Get Grounded

If possible, take a moment before a conversation to ground yourself. Try a few deep breaths to help you focus on being fully present. If you’re facilitating a meeting, you can guide the group through a grounding exercise to set the tone.

Minimize Distractions

In today’s work-from-home world, distractions are everywhere! Personally, I’ve found that I listen best when I wear my earbuds and turn off my camera. Sometimes, I even close my eyes to immerse myself completely in the conversation.

Take Notes

Jotting down key words and phrases helps you retain the conversation. Plus, if the other person sees you taking notes, they’ll feel heard and valued. You can always refer to your notes later to stay engaged in the conversation.

Paraphrase

Summarize what you’ve heard in your own words, including your interpretation of the speaker’s tone. For example: “You shared your thoughts about ___________, and from your tone, I’m sensing ___________.”

Ask Questions

Stay curious! If you don’t want to interrupt, write down your questions to ask later. If you’re unsure of what to ask, prepare a few questions ahead of time to guide the conversation.

 

Active listening requires intentionality. What steps will you take this week to listen more deliberately?